A post-dungoen-finder guide to instance etiquette

When I wrote my first guide to basic instance etiquette, I didn't expect that my work would be done, but I did at least think that it would at least last another patch. However, with the advent of patch 3.3 and the dungeon finder, it has become clear to me that the old rules governing instance etiq0uette have once again become inadequate. New behaviors have come up that are so horrifying that I am afraid to even run random dungeons these days, even though I am a tank and that solves about 25% of my potential problems. But rather than complain about this issue, I will instead compose some guidelines that we should all follow for a smooth instance run. Let's hope this does some good.

As a final word before I start this, if this all seems obvious to you, that is a good thing; it means you are likely not part of the problem.

Everyone:
-The fact that you will likely never see these people again is not an excuse to be a jerk. A little courtesy goes a long way and will make the run smoother for everyone.
-If you haven't run that particular instance before, say so. People will be more forgiving of your mistakes and will likely explain the boss fights to you.
-Do not kick people just because they don't have all ilevel 232 epics. No one needs über gear to run a heroic. Heroics were designed to be run in gear obtained from normals (ilevel 187 blues), reputations (ilevel 187 blues, 200 blues, or 200 epics), and BoE crafted items (ilevel 200 blues or epics). Remember the days when Wrath first came out? Everyone was in that kind of gear, if you were lucky; seeing someone in a heroic with low-level quest greens and blues wasn't uncommon in those days. If one person--or even four people--in your group has that kind of gear, you can still complete the heroic. Ninety nine times out of one hundred, you'll be able to carry the person in "sub-par" (I use the term sarcastically) gear and won't even notice their presence.*
-Likewise, if you are in the minimum gear for heroics, it helps to let your group know. If you are a DPS, this won't matter too much, but if you are a healer, the tank needs to know that he can't chain pull half the instance and the DPS need to know that they will have to avoid damage during the boss fights, and if you are a tank, the DPS need to know that they need to watch their threat and the healer needs to know that he/she may actually need to stay on his/her toes.
-Most items cannot be traded cross-realm, with two exceptions: conjured items and BoP items that dropped during that run. As such, there is no reason to flip out if someone accidentally picks need on an item you wanted and wins it; just ask for him to trade it.
-If you know an upcoming boss drops an item you need that is a lower tier of armor than what you can wear (like if you can wear leather and you need a cloth item the boss drops), let your group know so they know to pass on it and not hit the DE button.
-Don't link damage meters or recount. I have never sen anything good come from doing so. Only link them if one person is doing such bad DPS (as in triple digits) that you want to kick them, and you need to convince the group to do so.

Tanks:
-If someone is low on mana, see whether they are drinking to regenerate that mana. If they are, don't pull.
-Do not pull enemies when the healer doesn't have the mana to heal you, and make sure you give the healer enough time to regenerate that mana.
-Don't pull more enemies than your healer can handle. Pull one pack at first. If you healer has any trouble healing you through that, you'll know you can't chain pull during this run.
-Don't go so quickly that your group can't even loot the corpses. Wait until everyone is next to you before you pull. This is especially true for bosses.
-You should still go pretty quickly, since these days, with everyone in such amazing gear, you can, and most people will be glad you did so. Just go as fast as you can without violating any of the above rules.
-Don't body-pull enemies without causing any threat to them; if you do that, your healer will get aggro and die.
-Don't focus on AoE threat when everyone in your group is attacking one enemy at a time. Don't focus on single-target threat when your group is AoE'ing everything down.

DPS:
-It is not your job to pull enemies. If you don't like the pace the tank is going, tough it out. The only possible exception to this rule is if you are in a place where pulling patrols at opportune times is important in order to avoid pulling more enemies than you can handle. If your tank is about the finish killing the mobs you are fighting now and the patrol is in just the right place to pull it, then it is partially excusable to pull the enemy if you tank doesn't look like he has noticed it. Still, when this happens, it's best to try to bring that enemy to the tank so the tank will pick him up, either actively or accidentally with his AoE. Note that this situation will rarely, if ever, happen for you.
-Just because you and the healer out-gear the instance doesn't give you the excuse to act stupid and pull threat or take easily avoidable damage, such as standing in the fire.
-Turn on Target of Target in your interface menu and use it to attack whatever your tank is attacking. As a tank, there is nothing more annoying than a DPS who attacks enemies that I am not focusing on, even when they are behind me and are thus clearly not whom I am causing the most threat to.

Healers:
-As sad as I am to have to say this, you aren't allowed to pull enemies either (yes, I have seen healers do that).
-You should heal DPS through the occasional mistake, but saving them from their serial stupidity is not your responsibility. Do so if you are bored, but know that they will only learn their lesson when the see their repair bills.

*This rule obviously doesn't apply to the new Frozen Halls instances, and to some extent heroic Trial of the Champion. The gear requirements for those instances are much higher, and someone in all quest blues just won't be able to pull their weight unless their presence is offset by someone in full Trial of the Grand Crusader gear.