The end of the blog

This is my last post. After today, I will be writing no more posts for WoW Philosophized, because I have canceled my subscription to World of Warcraft. I have written a farewell letter to my guildmaster, removed my authenticator, uninstalled WoW on my laptop, removed all WoW-related bookmarks from Firefox, and now, only this last goodbye remains: the farewell post. Oh god, this is going to be difficult.

I could have put this off. I spent a lot of time in the latter days of Wrath of the Lich King not playing at all, yet still blogging consistently, relying on other WoW websites for sources of inspiration when the game could give me none. Had I so desired, I could have done the same thing for a few months, possibly even longer, before anyone caught on that I wasn't basing my posts on any in-game experience. It's a tempting thing to do, too, because I really do enjoy blogging about WoW, possibly more than playing it. But I have decided to quit WoW cold turkey by dissociating myself with everything regarding the game, short of my faded druid t-shit I still have in my bureau. As part of doing that, I won't be reading any WoW blogs now that I have stopped playing, and I certainly can't write about it. So I am bringing this blog down with my account, as I think it will help prevent me from regretting this decision.

I could turn this post into an excuse to complain about everything I think is wrong with the game, but I'm not quitting because I believe WoW has become a subpar game. I may be a vanilla baby (though the fact that I really came of age as a player during Burning Crusade probably makes me more of Burning Crusade teenager than a vanilla baby), but I was never the type to claim the game had been "ruined forever" by any change that was made to it. I have stayed with WoW as it has evolved through its various phases, and though I enjoyed some more than others, the fact that I have stuck with this game for five and a half years is testament to how much I enjoyed it. WoW has been a major part of my gaming hobby ever since I began playing it, and I do not leave now because I have suddenly gone from liking the game to thinking it is awful.

No, my reason for quitting now is because, thanks in no small part to the introspection brought about by writing for this blog, I have realized that WoW is just no longer made for players like me: the loners, the soloists, the people who play WoW as a largely solo venture because its solo content is (or was) good enough to keep us entertained. You would think that I would have taken the hint from the fact that it is an MMORPG, but the gameplay was enough to draw me in and bait me into playing a game that I didn't fully realized when I started playing that I was expected to play with others. And I tried to like this game, I really did. I tried battlegrounds, heroics, raids, auction house PvP, but nothing other than the solo content could keep my interest. And now, though I enjoyed Cataclysm's 80-85 quests thoroughly, having finished those and moved back to the "daily grind", I've realized that I just can't bring myself to keep playing WoW's solo content anymore. I used to enjoy the daily quests. Outland had some of the best dailies WoW has ever seen, but they have become less and less inspired with each expansion pack. And I finally realized that I was only doing the Cataclysm dailies for the prospect of gear. Yep, I had fallen into the trap of playing for the objective rewards, but the fact that I had managed to switch out of that mode of play not long before made it easy to find my way out.

I'm reminded of what Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw of Zero Punctuation said in his review of Cataclysm, when commenting about player's motivation for doing end-game content.

I asked someone who raids, "Why do you raid?" "To get the best items," they said. "What do you use the best items for?" I asked, to which they could only answer "To raid with." But it's not about items, is it? You don't honestly care if your new Crystal Nethersword is going to clash with your elite boss clogs. It's about the numbers. You want the items with the best numbers so you can use your numbers to decrease the enemy numbers until your numbers are the best in the land and all the other guilds flock to regard your numbers with jealous awe. And before you argue that lots of games are about numbers when you get down to it, no one ever ruined their lives to get 100% items in Super Metroid!

The whole review made me realize that there was less to my enjoyment of WoW than I had initially believed, but that particular passage made me really realize that it really was about the numbers. I was trying to get better gear (numbers) so that I could go into heroics with a bit of a buffer, but why was I trying to go into heroics in the first place? Yes, I enjoy taking, as doing the Crucible of Carnage reminded me, but if I only did heroics for their own sake, I would probably grow tired of them as quickly as I grew tired of daily quests (which means I would have grown tired of them after about two weeks, maybe a month because of the added group dynamic... no, the group dynamic would probably bring it down to a day). So what's left to sustain my interest in heroics after I have stopped enjoying running them? Why, the gear (numbers), of course! Yeah, sorry, I can't do it anymore.

But the biggest reason that I have given up on WoW (that's really a more accurate description than "quitting") is because I have realized that the only reason I continued playing was out of familiarity. The game was familiar to me, and having tried unsuccessfully to get into other RPGs (Fallout 3 and Fable 2, to be exact), I resigned myself to continue playing WoW to get my fantasy RPG fix. The fact that I had already accomplished so much also motivated me to stick with the game rather than trying something new, perhaps out of a hobby-related version of the sunk cost fallacy. But once I stopped valuing the objective rewards I had already obtained and started to value the process of obtaining those rewards more than the rewards themselves, I realized that I just didn't enjoy the game much anymore, in spite of all of the things I had earned (lesson learned: "things" will not make you happy). I have now realized that WoW and I are like a brontosaurus: recognized as a mistaken combination long ago, lingering only out of misplaced affection for an imagined past.

Well, that affection just isn't enough to sustain my playing anymore. My enjoyment of the game isn't going through a burn-out phase, it's passed on. It is no more. It has ceased to be. It's expired and gone to motivate me to play other games. It is a late enjoyment. It's a stiff. Bereft of exuberance, it rests in peace. If I hadn't insisted on continuing to play, my WoW folder would have been in my computer's trash can. It's rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-WoW-player.

And this is an ex-WoW-blogger, as well. But will the blogging itch strike me again? It very well might, and I very well might start blogging about something else on a different blog. But if I do, I will do it the same way I started this blog: I will start from nothing and earn my readership again. Whatever my new blog--if, indeed, I do start blogging again, which isn't a guarantee--is about, it will likely have nothing to do with WoW, so though I may be tempted to say, "Hey guys, come check out my new blog!", I won't do that unless someone likes my writing enough to ask me to keep them updated if I decide to write again. And as for this blog, I will leave it up as long as blogger decides its worth keeping up, and since I have it set to e-mail when I get a comment, I will still respond to any comments I get that I feel are worth as response. However, the "wowphilosophized.com" domain name will likely expire at some point, at which point you'll need to go back to typing in "wowphilosophized.blogspot.com" if you're still coming back for some reason.

So there it is. This is the end of my time as a WoW player, and there are no hard feelings on my part. This game has given me an amazing five and a half years, as well as an amazing year and a half of writing this blog. I never thought this blog would get as far as it has, and it's something that has made my time spent playing WoW better in many ways. I've had the opportunity to communicate with some truly wonderful individuals as a result of this blog, as well as be a part of the larger WoW community (the online part of which really isn't so bad), and without it, I might not have realized just how much I like writing. Thanks for reading; it has truly been a blast.

Adieu, adiue; parting is such sweet sorrow.

And yes, I'm still bitter over the removal of Tree of Life as a permanent form.

Guild perks and guilds "for guild's sake"

After putting it off for a week or so, I have finally broken down and joined a guild. I didn't join one to raid or anything like that; as you learned in Monday's post, I am a happy solo-er and have no desire to change that fact. So rather than join a raiding guild which would level up quickly and need to live a lie every time I log in, I posted the following message to my realm's trade chat:

Solo-er looking for guild. I'm not looking to raid or PvP, but if you let me into your ranks, I will help your guild level and earn guild achievements. PST, but please don't just send an invite; I want to get to know you before I join.

And so, the serially guild-less player has joined a guild, all because he couldn't resist that 10% mounted speed increase or those items awarded by the guild achievements. What have I done differently since joining this guild? Well, I've killed a lot more critters and had a conversation about archeology... so really, not all that much has changed. As I said in my post on Guild perks and the death of the independent player, I was happily guild-less until Cataclysm came out, so when I joined a guild, I didn't plan on changing much about my playstyle. Still, considering that I have enjoyed the conversations I have had since joining the guild, I suppose this change to my playstyle has been, overall, positive, and also fits my prediction as to why Blizzard seemed to be targeting us solo players with these guild perks.

See, in my post that I mentioned above, I theorized that part of Blizzard's motivation for putting in these guild perks was to get willingly guild-less players like me to join guilds (or, at the very least, it was an unintentional positive side-effect). This would be good for Blizzard because being guilded makes a player less likely to quit should he/she get bored. If it's a raiding guild, the player risks losing his spot or falling behind in the progression if he/she takes a break. If it's just a social guild, that social element could be what keeps the player playing after he/she has stopped finding the game itself interesting. But in my searching for a guild, I found many people who had come up with some ways to obtain these guild perks that didn't really mesh with Blizzard's seeming intentions in putting in these guild perks. I found people who had created guilds comprised of only their characters. I heard tell of people who had created guilds for the sole purpose of avoiding being asked to join guilds, guilds which didn't even have a chat channel, and which would now also serve the purpose of giving members the guild perks, but served absolutely no other purpose.

These guilds seem to me to be a sign that some people would rather work around the encouragement Blizzard is providing to join guilds and would rather just go for the rewards. In other words, Blizzard is encouraging players to play one way and giving them incentives to do so, but players would rather work around the system put in and try to get those incentives without conforming to Blizzard's pro-guild ideals. If these perks were put in to encourage players to join guilds, the fact that these "for guild's sake" guilds exist shows that not all players are willing to play as socially as Blizzard wants them to.

Now, I'm sure that encouraging guild-less players to join guilds wasn't the only purpose of these guild perks. The fact that it takes a long time to level up a guild means that these perks reward guild longevity, as well as discouraging players from reacting to guild drama by breaking off and starting their own guild, instead encouraging them to actually work through their issues. The fact that leveling up a guild actually requires the members to do something (questing, PvP, raiding, etc.) means that the guild perks rewards guilds who seek out members who are active participants, rather than seeking out large numbers of players just to have an impressively sized roster. And if nothing else, the guild perk and guild achievement systems breathe some life into what has long been a very stagnant and simple system. Still, one can't deny that those perks also discourage players from remaining guildless; the fact that these "for guild's sake" guilds are popping up prove that they do. Whether these other benefits to the perks system actually materialize remains to be seen, but if, as I theorized, Blizzard wants players joining guilds because it will discourage them from quitting, than the "for guild's sake" guilds show that they haven't exactly been successful in that goal, because those guilds don't provide any incentive to keep playing after the game has gotten boring.

All this makes me think that the guild perk system has failed in its purpose of bringing guild-less players into guilds, simply because it hasn't meaningfully changed their playstyle or made them more likely to keep playing when they get bored. What does this say about the system as a whole? Well, it's entirely possible that it was never Blizzard's intention to change the playstyle of us serial solo-ers, so perhaps it hasn't failed because it was never trying to do that in the first place. It also says something about us players, something which I don't think will surprise anyone: some of us are quite stubborn. You can see this stubbornness in the refusal of some people to adapt to the new methods of play required by this expansion (crowd control, triage, etc.), but if these guilds for guild's sake have shown us anything, it's that that resistance to change applies outside of combat as well.

But if it was indeed Blizzard's intention to use these perks to make us guild-less players join guilds, then the fact that they have failed shows that some of us aren't going to change that easily. We players who don't look to play WoW socially may be rare, but we do exist, and we don't like being told how to play. It's bad enough when other players and our friends try to "convert" us to a more social playstyle ("Raiding is fun, you just haven't found the right guild yet!"), but when Blizzard does it too, that's especially infuriating. But perhaps that's just Blizzard's way of saying, "This is our game, and we get to tell you how to play it. Now be social!" Fine, Blizzard; you have won this round, because I have indeed joined a guild and started being more social. Just don't think you can push this much farther.

The questionable legitimacy of objective rewards

So I'm back with more tales from the warrior front. As I mentioned in my last post before my laptop went down, patch 4.0.1 revitalized my interest in the game by turning my warrior alt from a joke to a force to be reckoned with, one who can take down red-colored-level monsters and complete red-colored quests with ease. What was once something of a burden has become fun; so fun, in fact, that I didn't want to stop playing my warrior. Killing things became so fun that I started to resent any break in the process, including needing to go to a capital city to learn my new moves. It was when I realized that this was the case that I was a bit shocked; after all, isn't leveling up the whole point of the leveling process? Why was I suddenly not looking forward to hitting those levels?

I remember that back before patch 4.0.1 made leveling a warrior fun, I looked forward to each time I leveled up. I would count the little bars in my experience bar and watch them fill, waiting anxiously for that time when I would see that golden light. Though all levels gave me a bit of a rush, the even ones especially were the ones I looked forward to, for that was when I would get my new abilities. But more than that, each of those levels represented something I had accomplished, something I had worked for. Leveling at the lower levels was usually not that fun, and each time I leveled up, it was like the game was telling me, "You should feel satisfied with what you have accomplished." And I did, and thus, though the leveling process was a pain, it was worth it for the sense of satisfaction I felt upon ascending to each new level.

Now, however, things are different (for me, at least). As I play my warrior, I don't watch the experience bar at all; I've been taken by surprise by that golden light quite a few times, in fact. And while the odd levels are met with joy (I do get to spend a talent point, after all), the even levels are met with less enthusiasm, since I have to go out of my way to learn whatever new ability I get at those levels. In other words, as I play my warrior now, leveling up is merely incidental to the leveling process; it's just another event that happens along the way. And it has become that way because the leveling process is now exciting in its own right, because this class is finally fun to play.

But now I'm a bit jaded, because I have experienced the contrast between playing for the objective statistical rewards and playing in spite of them. I have experienced the contrast between playing the game for the end result and playing the game for the sake of playing the game, and I'm not sure I could go back to the former. To put this in terms that might be more familiar to people who don't level alts frequently, the difference I have experienced is like the different between running a raid because you want to say you killed that boss or because you want the loot upgrades they drop, and running a raid because you enjoy raiding. One mode of play is motivated by the end-result, the other is motivated by the playing itself, and that's what I'm experiencing on my warrior now.

After experiencing this shift in mode of play, I realized that much of the time I have spent playing WoW has been spent in results-oriented mode. Most of the heroics I ran were motivated by the emblems that dropped and the gear that could be obtained with them. Most of the alts I leveled were leveled so that I could experience playing them once they got their better abilities and became fun, but I ended up leveling even the few that I managed to get that far for the sake of that flash of golden light. Maybe that's why I was never able to get into raiding; I was there for the experience, not the loot, the achievements, or the bragging rights, so I had nothing to motivate me to gloss over the things I found tedious or frustrating about the whole process.

So what does that mean in the larger scheme of things? Well, for me, it means I have become skeptical of many of the rewards we get for playing and their purpose in the game. By a metaphorical show of hands, how many of you would play WoW if there were no gear, no leveling up, no achievements, etc.; just the gameplay? Some of you would, I'm sure, so the other question is, how long would you play a game like this? Would you have raided ICC for ten months (going on eleven) if the gear weren't there to motivate you or to pace your progress? Maybe you would have; I won't make any assumptions, I'm just presenting these questions as food for thought.

But where am I going with this? Truth be told, I'm not sure myself; this mode of playing WoW is so new to me that I'm still getting a feel for it, for its nuances and consequences. I suppose the only thing I can say for now is that, though levels, gear currency, achievements, and gear itself might serve larger purposes within the game, they should be incidental to the gameplay itself. They should be there as conveniences and game mechanics, not as motivators to play. When they do become players' reasons to play, that's a sign that the gameplay itself isn't enough to keep people playing, and that says to me that the game just isn't fun.

What I am doing in-game

Since I am at a loss for something miscellaneous to write about and I recently went through a sort of revelation when it comes to my way of thinking about the game, I decided to detail what I am currently doing in-game.

I recently went through a phase where I was seriously considering why I was playing WoW. The only thing I ever did with any consistency was the fishing dailies. I found (and still find) the Argent Tournament dailies incredibly boring, and I have done the other dailies (at least the ones that give good money) to death, so I no longer enjoy them, either. I went over my general disapproval of Blizzard's dependence on dailies for Wrath solo content in this post, so read that if you want to know why I am so jaded toward daily quests. Anyways, because of my reluctance to do most dailies, especially the Argent Tournament ones, I have pretty much exhausted the Wrath solo content.

For some reason, the possibility of doing group content more rigorously never occurred to me, but when I thought about it, I realized that that was what I enjoyed most about WoW. Helping other people succeed, seeing new content, and experiencing new battles was what I enjoyed most about the game, and my comfort and aptitude with being a healer can certainly help me do that. As such, I am currently focused on getting better healing gear so that I can eventually move past Naxxramas and see Ulduar. There is really one thing about my healing set that I need to address more than the rest: my trinkets.

Currently, the two trinkets I am using in my healing set are both low-level green trinkets I got from some of my first quests: Futuresight Rune and Infused Coldstone Rune. They may be bad, but what I like about them is that they are both on-use trinkets, rather than random proc trinkets. This allows me to use them when I really need them. Still, I really need to replace them, and frequently running Trial of the Champion on normal mode has allowed me to obtain Tears of the Vanquished. It might not be an on-use trinket, but the fact that I don't need to worry about activating it probably makes it more useful. The other trinket I would like to get is the Winged Talisman from Heroic Halls of Lightning, but because of the lack of popularity of that instance, I'm not holding out hope of getting it any time soon.

The rest of the items that I want are all available through emblems, so I plan on running a lot of heorics, especially the daily heroics, since I will need 110 emblems of triumph to buy every piece of EoT gear I want. That's 55 daily heroic quest, and I have only done two since Blizzard added EoTs to them. Anyways, here's the gear I want, arranged by what emblems they take and how much I want them.

Emblems of Triumph:
Idol of Flaring Growth (25)
Band of the Invoker (35)
Talisman of Resurgence (50, this is my backup in case I can't get the Winged Talisman)

Emblems of Conquest:
Evoker's Charm (19)

Emblems of Valor:
Band of Channeled Magic (25)
Disguise of the Kumiho (25)

Once I have gotten all the items I want that I can buy with a certain emblem, I'll use any more I get to upgrade my armor, which is pretty good currently and doesn't warrant immediate replacement.

So, those are my plans for upgrading my gear. They originally included running normal Trial of the Champion a lot (the heroic version has nothing I can use aside from a marginal upgrade to my chest armor), but I have already gotten everything I want from that instance, so it's on to getting badges for me. The nice thing about doing the daily heroics is that I'll be able to see all the work Blizzard put into making those dungeons, which is, in my opinion, one of the best reasons to run instances. This was especially true when I ran Halls of Stone today, and I have to say, though we did rush through it (that DK tank was really impatient), I'm glad I got to see the work Blizzard's art department put into that dungeon.